my little friend, anxiety

The day shifted early, as Himself had planned on getting up very early for a morning meeting down at the Alano Club, but his get-up-and-go refused to cooperate. He also had a Club Executive Committee meeting this evening, so he opted to attend that instead.

Before he left, we needed to get a few grocery essentials. At the start of the day, I wasn't sure if I would be able to get cat food, but thanks to a tiny money miracle, I was. This Need to Get Cat Food probably contributed to the Low-Key Anxiety I felt today, some of which was not mine. At one point, I smudged our room with sage - something which is rapidly becoming a daily practice - and felt better.

Another contributing factor is probably the Santa Ana winds which are blowing all week this week, raising temperatures, lowering humidity, and increasing the fire risk. I know of some fires that were burning north of us in the Pacific Palisades area a day or so ago. We see a lot of the Santa Ana winds blowing in from the desert this time of year, and twice in recent years (in 2004 and 2007), we've had our own big wildfire experiences in San Diego, not to mention a few dozen smaller ones.

I will see if I can do a bit more huswifery tomorrow, as the anxiety threw me a bit off stride today. I do give myself credit for getting a full shower in, which basically means I washed my hair. Very important to do when I can't remember when I last washed it! ;)

Day 113: on shifting my focus

I chose today to shift my focus away from the outside world and concentrate more on what was in front of me, at home. I had to get a business call out of the way first, and compose a to-do list for this aspect of my life for the next month.

Once I was finished, and breakfast was eaten, then I went to work in my "favorite" area of the house: the kitchen. I didn't get as much done as I had initially intended, but the bed linens got washed, the trash and some of the recycling got taken out, and I cleaned up the recycling area of the house. The dishes can abide till tomorrow. 

Inkblot "supervised" while I remade the Queen Mother's bed. I found one of the cats' little jingly balls under mom's dresser, so I fished it out and tossed it out in the hallway. Inkblot stared at the ball like he had no idea what to do with it, which is not true; he's just not as enthusiastic with playing with toy balls as much as his sister is. Sure enough, as I'm finishing up with the bed, Pippa started playing with the ball, if the jingling was any indication. Now they're both asleep on my bed, having taken full advantage of this sunny and warm Santa Ana day.

I had an early lunch and a late dinner, and am rather happy for the mental respite. Tomorrow I return my focus to the world outside my home, but in a good way: a meeting with friends to discuss pleasureable business. More to come on that... 

Day 39: on being "appreciated" (day 1)

Today was the first of two "Provider Appreciation Days" I'm planning on attending. This one was put on by the union tht supports caregivers that have signed up to be Providers through In Home Supportive Services; as the Queen Mother's Provider, I was invited to come with a guest, if I so desired. (That's where Himself comes in.)

The event felt a bit haphazard at times, as there was no clear agenda set out for the event. They provided free swag, and I scored some - a scrub shirt, a sun screen for the car, and a reusable coffee mug - along with a "Certificate of Appreciation." The program consisted of some celebration of the election of union-friendly officials following the midterm elections, and an offer to sign up to go through their Leadership Academy. I filled out their application to see if I would qualify; the thought of advocating for other caregivers besides myself appeals to me.

Then there was the promised free lunch: salad and rolls for an appetizer, and some tasty cheese & spinach ravioli for vegetarians like myself. (Himself had the main chicken dish and didn't like his pasta. I ate his broccoli.) Dessert was cookies that had been left as a centerpiece at each table. During lunch, they had a belly dancer perform for us; she was very good, and striking with her body control, especially how delicately and precisely she could dance while balancing a sword upon her head! Finally there was a never-ending raffle (they had to keep drawing numbers because half of the providers had already left!) with various gift cards as the prizes. Unfortunately, we didn't win any of them. :(

Himself and I stopped at Starbucks before we headed home. I prepared the Queen Mother's dinner, and had my own later. Tonight feels like a night to get cozy, as the nighttime temperatures continue to fall. It's beginning to feel a lot like Winter, SoCal style. I'm just waiting for the Santa Ana to fall apart and for humidity to return to more normal levels...everything is so blessedly DRY right now, which is NOT helping the fire situation to the north of us. The weather forecasts are hinting at actual Rain next week (!!), so keep those prayers coming!

Tomorrow it's the County of San Diego's turn to appreciate "us Providers," so it will be interesting to compare notes. and lunches. ;) 

Day 8: on feeling satisfied

First, I am congratulating myself on making it a week with blogging; more, to set up my blog on my little tablet, which I can use to make entries while the TV is on in the other room - and I don't have to feel distracted or upset or whatever.

Second, I'm also satisfied that I got some housework done today: the laundry is done, the kitchen is cleared of recycling and trash, and the dishes are in the dishwasher, which I will start once I finish this entry. It hasn't always been easy to find or generate enough motivation to work on the house, and put things (back) in order, and sometimes it's really super challenging to bust out of the Stinking Thinking and see a task through to completion. Today, order prevailed, for once I can actually GET started, momentum will carry me through to the end.

Today was a calm Autumn day, with rain in the morning and cool breezes in the afternoon. Typical of Southern California, though, a Santa Ana is supposed to be set up by the start of the week. Basically, hot dry desert winds blow in from the north and east, warming everything up and making it feel more like Summer, minus the humidity. I am one of those "weird" people who actually enjoy the heat, so I will be quite satisfied with the weather for my birthday next week.

I also had a good day with the Queen Mother. With Himself out taking care of his business today, mom was able to relax a bit more than usual, sine Himself usually watches "too much" TV, and has the house "too cold" for her to be comfortable. She mentioned lasrt week she wanted to eat a TV dinner, so I found a Hungry Man dinner for her. Yes there are leftovers, but she seemed to enjoy it well enough. After talking about the dinner, I made a note to look for some of the Stouffers dinners she "used to eat all the time." I wonder if she will remember what dhe used to like and not likem or if she'll simply eat what I put down in front of her.

It feels good to conclude here. We shall see what tomorrow brings...