Day 77: on "forced rest"

Although I woke up feeling okay this morning, by the end of the day I was not a happy camper. The muscles in my lower back started seizing up, and by the time I left the house to take care of errands, I was listing rather noticeably (to me, at least, if to no one else) to the left. My left leg happens to be a bit shorter than my right leg, so normally I wear a heel lift in my left shoe (and sandal) to even myself out. If I go barefoot for too long, or/and if I don't keep my heel lift taped in my footgear, then the unevenness of my gait catches up with me, and my lower back wants to go out.

Fortunately, Himself has a Tens unit, which provides electrotherapy to the spasming muscles. Also fortunately, our car has a warming feature in the front seats which heat up rather nicely to soothe sore muscles. I personally respond to Heat better than I respond to Ice, and I have tried both. On out way out and back this evening, I took advantage of both the Tens unit and the heat, which helped immensely. I took a couple of Motrin once I came back home - something I very rarely do, but it was much needed. I am now sitting reasonably comfortably in bed, lower back totally supported, and will have a nice lie down when I'm done with this blog entry.

Here I was looking for Stillness and Quiet for some deep journaling at Yuletide, and it looks like I'm going to get exactly that, especially since the chiropractor won't be back in until Wednesday. Between the Tens unit and the Motrin, I'll be okay until then. No worries.

Now if y'all will excuse me, I'm going to lie down for a spell... 

Day 14: on finishing a busy day

I am feeling tired on several levels, but here I am in my commitment, checking in.

The flow of the day went well enough. Himself got to his appointments, and I got the Queen Mother to her doctor's appointment. In her case, we are going to stay the course, for now. She has been experiencing more pain as the weather has gotten colder. If she needs to take her pain meds, we will get her a stool softener to take with those meds, to see if we can avoid a repeat experience of the gastrointestinal "roller coaster" she rode a month ago.

Part of why I'm tired now is because the Queen Mother was in a foul mood when she woke up and came out of her room. She despises going anywhere outside the home, mainly because going to and fro is a significant physical challenge. Every bump in the road, every jolt of uneven pavement, causes her pain. Of course, as her dutiful daughter, I'm trying to keep everything flowing as smoothly as possible. We made it to the doctor's office and back again today, but - whew!

Part of why I'm tired is that tomorrow I am most likely going to accompany Himself on a quick trip to LA, helping a friend get to LAX. I found myself super triggered by the idea: Why do I have to Sacrifice my precious time? Why am I making All Of The Sacrifices? How much more do I have to Sacrifice before I/we can emerge from the LACK I/we have been swimming in, sometimes just managing to keep my/our head/s above water? I wound up emotionally vomiting all over Himself on our way to our weekly meetings this evening, but he didn't get angry. He just assured me that everything was going to be okay; and after a while, I did start to feel better - but not before I had done some soul-deep venting.

Fortunately, the day is over, and I can mark this day as done. Tomorrow will be a fresh new opportunity... :)