Wednesday, April 3, 2019

Day 180: on shifting my perspective

While writing in the Morning Pages, a radical idea came up: what if I am exactly where I'm supposed to be, doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing? What if many of those times I have been depressed have actually been instances where some of my Stuck Ego has died and been sloughed off and away? What if my down moments have contained secret gifts that I'm only now opening?

I am certainly a different person now than I was at the start of my Odyssey, and I have yet to sit down and try to quantify these changes. Thinking about my travails in this fashion has settled me down a bit, and I'm not so anxious as I have been.

I managed to get the washing of the sheets (for the Queen Mother and for myself) done today, and we managed to get to Walmart today. Score on both counts.

The evening was interesting: a dinner seminar about retirement at Carver Steakhouse in Rancho Bernardo. The topic piqued Himself's interest, because he's going to need some advice about what to do with his VA back pay when it finally comes. So we have a free appointment tomorrow morning, with no further obligation. I think we'll talk to this dude, one of the Credit Union's investment dudes, and maybe one or two others before we choose who will advise us. Himself was very impressed with Carver's Prime Rib, whereas I batted my eyes, smiled sweetly, and asked for a vegetarian substitution. I was rewarded with a penne pasta dinner with red peppers, asparagus, and broccoli in an alfredo sauce, along with some oh-so-divine garlic bread.

Dessert wasn't offered, but Himself got an idea in his head from an earlier conversation we'd had, and he took me to a Krispy Kreme donut shop. We got half a dozen donuts, three of them being the California equivalent of the "Boston Cream" donut. I had one, he had one, and the Queen Mother had one. We all agreed that they were lovely.

So we will see what happens tomorrow with the consultation, and afterwards. It might or might not rain; it didn't rain during the day today, but it had rained overnight Tuesday night into Wednesday morning. My ears are up and listening for more rain, just in case. April showers - what a concept!

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